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Sweltering summer quickies

June 19th, 2009 at 12:34 pm

I finally signed up for Netflix. I knew that this on-demand viewing was the "wave of the future", but I had no idea that it was as sophisticated as it is! Seriously, Netflix has made at least 5 seemingly good recommendations to me!

The downside is that it does add an extra monthly expense to my budget. That alone has been the reason why I've delayed Netflix for so long. The upside is that it helps me keep me off the streets, and not roll with the bad crowds. That's good right? Big Grin

The heat is ridiculous. The room AC, so far, has only been able to cool off half of my room, but frankly, that's enough for me... because that's the side where I sit. Big Grin Hopefully, the energy savings will be significant for the next billing cycle.

This is my current FireCalc projection. Frown

Of course, FireCalc is just a rudimentary Monte Carlo Simulator, and it's based on my current numbers, like... if I am attempting to retire right now, instead of some made-up projected number that I am expecting later on. I know that's not using it quite right, but I wanted to know where I stand right now, and that's as good of an answer as any.

On the upside, there's still plenty of time for things to improve (or muck up), so I'm not reading too much into it.

This may not be entirely financially-related, but although I am "only" 35, I am beginning to have those... thoughts. You know, the ones about, "Where I am? How did I get here? Where am I going?" thoughts. And I have to say, I'm honestly not all that happy with the answers to any of those kinds of questions.

Well, whatever happens to me, all I can do is the best that I can right? I also think that I'm going to be single for the rest of my life. I shouldn't say that because, when I was single, I never thought that I'd actually get married, and when I was married, I never thought that I'd actually get divorced. So, life is full of surprises, I suppose, but I don't know... I'm getting older. And I am beginning to wonder why anybody would want to put up with a guy like me.

Sorry to sound so down, but that's how I feel right now anyways.

And to be perfectly honest? I'm not sure if it would be an entirely bad thing to stay single. Yeah, I mean, secretly, everybody wants to find their "soulmate", but for all practical purposes, I don't have it that bad at all. So, I really can't complain....

I don't know, just rambling. Big Grin

8 Responses to “Sweltering summer quickies”

  1. pretty cheap jewelry Says:

    ACK you are making me feel old! How come so many out there are younger than me?! Nevermind, at least I don't think there's going to be a midlife crisis here.

    I got married late, 35!! And didn't even have kids till 39. Lessee, that means my kids will get out of college...scritch scribble scratch...when I'm 72??

    Just keep on keepin' on.

  2. Apprentice Bliss Hunter Says:

    Emmm... I think a lot of people will empathise with you...

    I think one of great tricks life plays on people is power of projection...

    when we are feeling low, which is perfectly natural from time to time -not regularly, then our entire perception of our future becomes negative... for no reason based in reality or "fact"... it's like a drop of ink gets into the glass of water and discolors the whole thing...

    The thing is... next week you may feel completely different... and your perception of your future may then be different..

    We are all slaves to our feelings in this regard.

    Maybe breaking this bondage to our up-and-down internal dialogue is one of the things the Buddhists you referred to before aim for ??

  3. Phenomenal Woman Says:

    I think you tend to be "positively pessimist" if there is a word. Ask yourself, "why not me?" "What can I change today so I can be happy?" instead of dwelling on your perceived negativeness. A positive mindset will make you glow.
    You are really not alone! I struggle with this myself. Work is hard and my team dynamic is in a pathetic state, enough to make me depressed and not want to wake up in the morning to go to work and I see no end to it.
    I am married for the second time but luckily it feels like my first. I remember feeling and actually believed that no man would ever want me after my divorce because of the experience I had to go through from the first marriage , in serious debts and being deaf on top it all. Well go figure; I am now happy in my marriage. But I am now older and still have no children. I wanted to be a young mom. I had two miscarriages this year already. For some reason, I think each chapter in life, we are always going to urge for something more try to fulfill new desires and fix new problems. If we were all happy in every way, maybe there would not be any motivation to keep going?
    It's truly the journey and not the destination. But yes I admit, my husband and the passion to please God give me the strength to keep on going.

    I guess this came off as a ramble as well! Sorry about that.

  4. gamecock43 Says:

    If I ever become single again- I would never remarry. I hate to say it- but I was dating BB for 9 years- been married about 8 months- dating was better. Just a tad bit, but it was better.

    And firecalc...ummm no idea what it is but its pretty.

  5. boomeyers Says:

    I have those questions all the time and being married, there is just not a lot I can do change things, so being single does have its pluses. However, we are working on our 20 year anniversary and it is nice to know that someone is there for me. Just because we are at the point in our lives where we are not madly in love, we would do anything for each other. So never say never to someone special in the future!

  6. Caoineag Says:

    FYI, this wasn't the type of negativity that bothers me. Trust me, moodiness about your own life is not the same as judgment on someone elses.

    Maybe you find someone, maybe you don't, but you still have to live with yourself so self reflection is not a bad thing. Just remember to not focus solely on your negative traits.

  7. Broken Arrow Says:

    Thank you all for your thoughts.

    Gamecock, FireCalc is a simple retirement calculator, to see if your retirement money is likely to last.

    Instead of me explaining it though, why not check out their website?


  8. lizajane Says:

    I didn't really have the blahs until a few years ago. "What is my purpose in life?" was the nagging question. My hubby's answer was that I was here to take care of him! Um, that's not the big purpose that I had in mind...

    I think when you least expect it, you'll meet someone. "Why not me" is definitely a better thought than "why me". Stick with that for awhile.

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